Surprise...it's TWINS

Keeping this secret for nearly 2 months has been exhausting to say the least. So it was quite a relief to let the cat, or shall I say cats, out of the bag on Christmas.

Each parent received the same gift; a framed ultrasound picture with a note 'Surprise, its Twins!'. Since we were in NY for Christmas, Chris's parents received the picture directly from us. As Judy opened the gift she said 'I think I know what this is' to which I replied 'I'm pretty sure you don't!'. She was surprised.

For my mom, I sent the gift home with her from her last trip here, only I had put someone elses name on it so she wouldn't open it before Christmas. Sneaky me. I then called my brother and asked him to switch the tag on Christmas day and record her response if possible. Apparently he was caught a bit of guard when she first opened it but here she is a few seconds later...



My dad got the same gift, delivered by my brother. Though Dustin did capture his response on video, I've yet to see it. However, my dad did tell me it was the best Christmas present ever.

all things Ryan: 18 months

My baby boy is 1 and a 1/2 years old. These last 18 months flew by and they are quite a blur. I can't believe how many milestones we've witnessed in such a short time. And now my baby boy is going to be a big brother! I can't even begin to describe how much I love this little boy. His laid back personality has undoubtedly eased my transition to motherhood.

He's weighing in at 25 pounds. He's got a mouth full of teeth, I'd report how many if he'd let me look in there for more than 2 seconds. What I do know is he gets several teeth at a time and he handles it like a champ. Here's a very tired chair picture...


~ He's so caring. When another child is crying Ry looks at me panicked, like 'mom help him'. He has to be reassured the child is ok or he starts crying too.

~ He's become quite the snuggle bug. He loves to give kisses and hugs. Sometimes he's in the middle of playing, stops, gives me a kiss, then carries on. Melt my heart.

~ There can't possible be a more regimented child out there. He loves his routines. And I love that I can count on his routines to bring us peace.

~ Speaking of routine, here's our current bedtime routine...Chris gives Ryan a bath, brushes his teeth and hair, and gets him in his jammies. Then we read him a book as a family. Ryan and Chris each offer me a hand to pull me up off the floor or out of the chair (he's such a copy cat). Chris carries Ryan to his bedroom, I turn on the 'rain', and we put Ry's baby to bed on the changing table (more on that in a sec). Then we play a game to get Ryan to Mama (fly to Mama, hide from Mama, jump to Mama, etc). Once he's in my arms Ryan leans in for a family hug, he presses my head and Chris's head together to make us kiss, and then he kisses each of us (sometimes its a triple kiss). Then Chris leaves the room. I put Ryan in his bed, we turn on the fish tank and the glow worm, Ryan gives me a hug from bed and then waves me goodnight. I love this routine.

~ Ryan's been loving on his baby doll. He gives her kisses and hugs, pats her back, and claps her hands. A couple times he was holding her while I was reading touch and feel books and he touched her hands to the different textures. So sweet.

~ He has wild and crazy, beautifully blonde, curly hair. His many cowlicks will give him trouble for years to come. He's had 2 haircuts thus far, of which he's certainly not a fan.


~ He mimics everything. It's amazing what he's learning when no one is looking. He brought me my robe and slippers one morning when he wanted me to get out of bed! In addition to copying us, he likes us to play 'copy cat' with him.

~ He throws a mean temper tantrum.

~ He's got quite a fascination with babies, which is obviously a good thing right now. He loves to look at babies when we are out and about. He particularly loved his baby cousin Carter. He wanted to hold his hand and kiss his head. And when Carter was lying, peacefully I might add, on the floor, Ry insisted I pick him up (which I did happily).


~ He throws when he's angry or frustrated. I hope this is a short lived phase.

~ He can point to his head, neck, eyes, mouth, tongue, teeth, nose, feet, toes, legs, arms, hands, fingers, and cheeks. Just watch out when he's pointing to your eyes!

~ He requires all his 'hurts' be kissed.

~ He loves the outdoors. We have to drag him back inside. He particularly loves to go searching for squirrels (or as we call it - squirrel hunting). Oh, and extreme temperatures are of no concern to him.



~ He's a pretty quiet kid. When he does say words its in a whisper and with a smile.

~ He dances when the mood strikes but not on command!

~ He is still the most loved baby in the whole world!

thoughts along the way...

Even though many aspects of this adventure have been kept hush hush I've been keeping a 'blog log' to post when the time is right. And its time.

Written 10-17-11
We had 12 frozen embryos from our previous IVF. The plan, same as last time, transfer 2 embryos. Initially, 3 were defrosted, only 1 survived. So, 3 more were defrosted, 2 of which survived. Yes, that makes 3 'survived' embryos, but only 2 were used.

Which brings me to this, every once in awhile I totally panic at the thought of having twins. Sure, the odds are about 30% that there are 2 babies, but that means the odds of having only 1 baby are 70%! Taking care of a newborn and a toddler is already daunting. Taking care of TWO newborns AND a toddler is bound to be downright impossible, right? So, why put in 2 embryos and risk twins, the answer is easy; We put in 2 last time and only 1 hung on. Don't get me wrong, whether this pregnancy results in 1 or 2 babies, I will be thrilled. Twins just present more, um, challenges.

When I'm not totally panicked about having twins, I'm worried about miscarrying. It seems as if I know hundreds of people who've recently lost pregnancies. Ok, maybe that's an exaggeration but its been several people. I'm sure also playing into the fear is the fact that I was told I lost the pregnancy last time (which of course I didn't). Anyway, as my hubbie says, positive thoughts!

Written 10-21-11
I've had a headache for three days now. Of course, I can't take my usual arsenal of drugs. It wont go away! I took a percocet two nights ago and not only did it not help but it made me sick! I just took a lortab and while it did work, It makes me feel drunk and very sleepy (which really limits it's usage when caring for a toddler). And the trade off is headache for stomachache. Let's just say it's not a fair trade.

Written 10-28-11
We have 6 days til we get to see our baby, or babies, that are causing me so much trouble. My debilitating headache passed (after a trip to the OB and some demerol) just in time for severe morning sickness to settle in. Or rather, ALL.DAY.SICKNESS. With Ryan I was somewhat sick but this takes the cake. My nausea laughs at the efforts of phenergan and zofran. Today is day 7 of complete misery. I have a stash of saltines by my nightstand, in my car, in the diaper bag, and at work. I'm so sick of saltines, no pun intended.

As all this was going on my mom happened to be in town, I had to practically lie to her all weekend. Not only did I hide 'all things fertility' such as drugs, needle boxes, and our precious embryo pictures, I even said we were planning to try for #2 after the holidays. I wonder if she figured it out and is waiting for me to tell her. Seriously, I have no idea if I'll make it til Christmas!

Written 11-4-11
Yesterday, Chris met Ryan and I at the RE's office for an ultrasound (7w4d). I was so nervous I was shaking and sweating. Chris held Ryan in one hand and held my hand in the other. As soon as the image appeared on the screen Chris and I saw exactly what we both suspected, more on that in a minute. The doctor immediately moved the wand to look at my ovaries and as he did so he reassured us that things looked ok and that it would take him a minute to get oriented (such a crock but I still loved the reassurance). He then moved over and showed us our sweet baby, measuring about 10mm, with a fluttering heartbeat. He said 'looks great!' Then he moved over and showed us baby number 2, measuring about the same, also with a fluttering heartbeat! 'Both look great, congratulations!' TWINS. That first image Chris and I had seen was both babies!

I was instructed to continue my drug regimen until 12 weeks, have a few more drug level labs, and to make an appointment with the OB (which I did and is scheduled for 11-16-11).

Written 11-6-11
It's officially been 2 weeks of non stop nausea. It's taking a toll of my mental sanity. I've resorting to investigating alternative therapies like ginger and motion sick bands...desperate? Yes.

Written 11-16-11

First OB appointment was fairly standard. Labs, flu shot, pap, education, ultrasound, etc.. Everythings looking good.

Written 11-24-11

We couldn't wait any longer. The cats out of the bag. Well, at least one cat is. We're saving the news of twins for Christmas.

Written 12-15-11

Second OB appointment. This was the first time we got to hear the babies heartbeats. I love that sound. Both heart rates were in the 160's, perfect. I learned I will be seeing my OB every 2 weeks til 20 weeks and then weekly after that. Seriously? Seems like overkill to me but better be safe than sorry. The good news is I will have an ultrasound monthly to check on the babies growth!

Written 12-19-11

Both Chris's parents and my parents have asked if it was twins and we said no, a singleton pregnancy was confirmed. My mom was in town this weekend and directly asked me if I was having twins and just holding out on her. I said no. Does she believe me? Not sure. Only 6 more days til the secrets out, thank God!

Written 12-20-11

I'm 14 weeks and 2 days today. That's 2nd trimester. Why, oh, why am I still so sick? All I want for Christmas is relief.

Written 12-25-11

The secrets out. More on that soon.

Ryan & Santa (and Mama)

I had no intention of getting Ryan's picture with Santa this year as he's in peak stranger danger mode...and whose stranger to a toddler than a fat man in a red suit with a long beard? Well, we happened upon a Santa at a party, and as suspected, Ryan wanted nothing to do with the big guy. The plan was for Santa to leave, let us sit down, then sneak behind us. As you can see by Ryan's expression, he caught on.

FET #1

Yes, I'm pregnant. No, it didn't just happen! We found out on Ocotober 10th that our first attempt at FET (frozen embryo transfer - the same as IVF except we used embryos from Ryan's cycle) was successful. We planned to wait til Christmas to tell our families but the wait nearly killed me, so we made it a Thanksgiving surprise instead. For those of you who want the details here they are...

FET #1:

Mid-September 2011: Start estrogen pills

September 25th: Start Progesterone injections

September 27th: Antibiotics (4 times a day for 4 days)

September 27th: Steroids for 4 days

September 30th: Valium then transfer of 2 perfect blastocysts!

October 10th: BFP! 10dp5dt - HCG 414

October 12th: 12dp5dt - HCG 840

October 14th: low estrogen level, increase estrogen pills from 2 to 3 X a day

November 3rd: 40 IM (um, big) shots thus far (oh, as if the pain wasn't bad enough, I developed a allergic reaction-itching!), 7w4d US = happy healthy heartbeat!

November 11th: Estrogen and Progesterone labs, estrogen pills decreased to 2 X day, progesterone decreased from 2ml to 1.5ml

November 16th: first OB appointment, 9w3d US = HR 170!

November 31st: more labs, decreased estrogen pills to 1 X day, progesterone decreased to 1ml.

December 4th: After nearly 80 shots (in a mere 2 spots on my behind) and countless pills, I'm FINALLY done with meds! First trimester DONE...let the sickness subside (more on that later)!

So Thankful...

Ry's First Haircut

Chris has been pushing for quite awhile for Ryan's first haircut. Unable to bare cutting off his curls, I held off as long as I could. But, alas...

Before

Notice the hair over his ear on one side and the hair that just sticks straight out on the other side

This is how we started

And this is how we finished

I can only imagine his confusion about what was taking place. Poor baby. The hairdresser cut his hair as he hugged me tightly. When he turned his head, she just switched sides. Not the best cut, but certainly the best under the circumstances.

After

Still precious!

Grandma Comes to Visit

I had a few days of computer training last week and our sitter wasn't available, so Grandma Hayes to the rescue. Though they don't see each other often, he took to her instantly.

First the children's museum...

Then to the park to see the animals...

Look who showed up...Grampa!

Thanks for all your help Grandma!

All things Ryan: 15 months

My plan is to continue 'All things Ryan' every 3 months (15, 18, 21, 24) for year 2. He currently weighs 22 lbs & 14 oz (30th-ish percentile). That's only 14 oz more than 3 months ago. No worries though, its not uncommon for weight gain to slow for an active toddler.

*Side note: I know he may be a toddler per textbooks, but he's still a baby to me*

He's 32.5 inches tall (85th percentile). Up 1.5 inches from 3 months ago.
Oh, and his head remains in the 95th percentile. His development is where the most growth has occurred.

~ He mimics everything we do. Cute sample, we have to kick the bottom of our front door to get it to open in high humidity. Ryan now stands at the door and lifts his leg (he looks like a puppy marking his territory) and pretends to open the door.

~ He's outgrown his first pair of shoes (sniff, sniff). But he loves his new pair!


~ He follows almost all commands. Correction, he's capable of following all commands though he follows only those he chooses.

~ Prior to the last month, Ryan was relatively quite. He only babbled with the 'M' sound. Over the last couple weeks he's picked up 'N' and 'B' sounds as well. It's amazing how a mere 3 sounds can make such elaborate and often very serious sounding conversations.


~ Upon entering our house, every child between the ages of 10 months and 2 years heads directly to our stairs for a climbing expedition. Every child except our own that is. Yes, he's never shown much interest in exploring the upstairs until...well, funny story...I was cooking him breakfast when I didn't hear him for a minute or two so I did my usual 'wheres Ryan' in which he normal pops in the kitchen laughing. Another 'wheres Ryan' and I hear a half giggle, half panic from UPSTAIRS! As I looked at him from the bottom of the stairs I saw my chances of winning mother of the year dissipate. A gate was ordered and installed that day!

~ Ryan loves all things outdoors. Our new house offers new playing opportunities including grass suitable for barefoot play and a screened in back porch equipped with a water table. And we live within walking distance to a park (and a library). Boy love.



~ He signs more, eat, shoes, book, and 'itsy bitsy spider'. He points. He shakes his head no (more often than I'd like).

~ We got a family membership to the areas children's museum. He loves it. The shot is of our playgroup...they grow up so fast!



~ Ry's still a pretty chill kid. And he loves to people watch other kids, especially older ones.

~ He's still the most loved baby EVER!

One Year: Part 2

Here are a few things about Ryan's first year, my first year as a Mother, I want to remember...

I loved breastfeeding. I knew it was the best option for Ryan but I had no idea I would enjoy it so much. I suppose it was a combination of bonding and ease. The milk was always ready, always the right amount, and required no scrubbing bottles with long brushes and hot water. The ability to calm Ryan at any given moment was also a perk.

I surprised myself when it came to feeding Ryan, post-breastfeeding that is. Fresh, organic, healthy...I'm very picky as to what he eats. Oh, and he never ate pre-made baby food...ewww!

I love myself some TV, but, ironically, I've yet to allow Ryan any tube time. In fact, at least as of now, the TV isn't even on when he's awake.

Even I would have bet high stakes against me using cloth diapers....though now I'm a dedicated cloth diaper-er! Who knew?

I'm picky with what he wears. I don't like zippers directly on his skin (rules out most jammies). Don't like the oh so popular appliques on so many tops (I certainly wouldn't want my shirt to be rough). I'm even picky about the type of waist band on his bottoms! And this doesn't even touch on style!

I'm not exactly known for my patience. However, I've surprised myself with the amount of patience I have with Ryan. Now, my patience with other people, that's a whole other story.

Of course I love my child. I expected that. What I never thought about, prior to Ryan, was how much I would love his affection towards me. I'm not sure if, at his age, its love or simply security but I LOVE it when he wants me. Whatever the reason, hurt, scared, happy...its the best.

In addition to becoming a mom, 15 months ago, I got to watch my love become a father. He was a natural from the get go. We make a great team, if I do say so myself!

The Hayes Home

In an attempt to shorten Chris's commute we put our house on the market. Of course, its an awful market for sellers. On the flip side, its a great market for buyers. Or so they say. Well, after 5 weeks on the market, it sold. Woo hoo! Five weeks of keeping the house in show condition, not to mention having to take Ryan and Mazie out for said showings, was enough! Closing is in 2 weeks. Its certainly bittersweet. This was our first home together. Where we came home the day after we married. Where we brought Ryan home from the hospital. On the sweet side, we'll be in a more desirable location, 30 miles closer to Chris's office, and in our neighborhood we're fortunate to have sold at all.

As for our new address...its less than ideal. Let me explain. We couldn't find a house. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't for lack of trying. I looked at many, many, many houses. We actually fell in love with one. Put in an offer. Lost. As for the other homes, well, there were no sparks. So, with our impeding closing date we chose to rent a house for the time being. Its comparable to our current home, in an ideal location.

We're as packed as we can be with 2 weeks til the move. We signed a year lease, with a clause allowing for termination of the lease with a 60 day notice. While I don't want to move right after moving, we'll keep an eye on the market.

Sweetest Birthday Boy Ever

We celebrated at home...

In New York...

And at playgroup...

Seriously, he's the sweetest, most loved, birthday boy ever!

Fourth of July - 2011

One year after Ryan's due date, our little family of three went swimming at Pocahontas State Park. It was Ryan's first water adventure. He loved the water, the kids, and the commotion...all one hour of it!

All things RYAN: 1 year

At 10:39pm on June 27th, 2011, my sweet baby turned ONE. Bittersweet for sure. On one hand he's growing into a wonderful, loving child and on the other he's no longer my little baby. He weighs 22 lbs, 4 oz and is 31 in tall. That's a lifetime weight gain of 16 lbs, 5 oz and a 12.5 inch increase in length.

~ He actually respects the word 'no'. How many people can say that about their 1-year-olds? I'm fully aware this is liable to change at any given minute.

~ Because he recently hit the 30 inch mark, he just transitioned from his infant carseat to his big boy carseat.

~ Ryan still gives open mouth kisses to things/those he loves...people, feet, and animals in his books. But my favorite of his affections is the head nod. It's kinda his signature hug. Sometimes, when someone asks for a kiss, and he doesn't want to kiss them, he simply leans his forehead forward for the said someone to kiss. Even better, he bumps foreheads at random when he wants to show affection. It's so adorable.

~ His blond hair is getting longer and I just love how the curls around the bottom fly out. His cowlicks are going to be lifelong trouble.

~ He continues to give our feet undo attention. He will kiss them repeatedly!

~ He's a great sleeper so long as he's in his bed, sound machine on rain, aquarium nearby, and glowworm in hand. He takes still takes 2 naps and he 'rests quietly' in bed once too. He goes to bed around 6:30pm and sleeps til around 5, 5:30am. It doesn't matter when he goes to bed, he gets up at the same time every morning.

~ He has awesome blue eyes!

~ He is truly a mellow child. Sure, he's active and into everything, but he's actually quite calm. And he's such a good baby.

~ He had his first mall-water-fun experience. He seemed to think it was only so-so.

~ Trying to put shoes on Ryan is like trying to wrangle an alligator.

~ He's a very regimented little boy.

~ He's a great eater. Sure, some days he likes carrots and some days he doesn't.

~ I'm pretty certain he loves the tuperware that houses his blocks more than the actual blocks. Best of all, we play 'smooch face' with the lid. We all do it. Sometimes we kiss each others smooch face.

~ Recently he started playing with pillows. He gets on his knees, holds the pillow up, and then falls down with the pillow. You might need to see it to understand but it's so cute and can entertain him for a good 10 minutes.

~ He still digs a good game of peek-a-boo. Variety keeps it current.

~ He loves practicing walking with his super cool car!

~ He is the most loved baby ever!